Weapons

SWORDS (8)
[text about swords]

Looks like a sword but actually isn't one. Only cuts in the hand of a true actor. But psst, nobody has to know that.

Found: You get it at the start of the game, right in front of the theater.

When the kingdom got in trouble for the first time, a very inexperienced blacksmith crafted a first version of this blockish sword. Now it's a soldier's standard gear, with a handy two-hit-combo and a long reach.

Found: You can get it from executing the soldier under the guillotine or from a chest in the barracks.

Made out of a light but stable material, the Cuttana is perfect for landing 3-hit combos in rapid succession. Cuts enemies like paper and paper like enemies!

Found: In a chest in the dungeons. At the split path where you can turn right to walk towards the sewer gates, turn left instead into the room with the golem shooting at you from the end of the hallway. The chest on the right holds the sword.

Give your enemies the one-two-three-hit with this mighty sword!

Found: At the start of the barracks, go down the stairs in a room full of bombs. Pick up a bomb head from the red bomb chest and explode near the cracked wall on the right to reveal a chest with the sword in it.

"Since the dawn of time, experts debated whether or not wood is the best and strongest material to make weapons out of. If you ask me, it's not, but what do I know." - Sabaku, Cubologist

Found: Right in front of the bridge leading to the library at the cliffs, turn right through the shrubbery to follow a hiking path down to the beach. Use your gumboots or bunny slippers to walk over the ocean water and pick up the sword drifting near the shores.

Looks fragile, but is actually very sturdy and does a lot of damage. Your true face reflects from it.

Found: At the start of the library you’ll find a naked cuboid beneath a pile of books. Bring him the Librarian’s coat which is up, then take a left turn and walk past the golems in the dimly lit room. The coat will be sitting on top of a table. He’ll take the coat of you in exchange for the glass sword.

A big thank-you gift from Ortiz, Knight of the Foursquires. Very heavy, not handy at all for small cubes. It is said the soul of a powerful creature lends the blade its strength.

Found: You need to save Ortiz first by going to the hedge mace in front of the castle’s gates. Find a red spot in the hedges and cut it down with an axe to find him hanging off a red tree. Cut down that tree with an axe as well and he’ll tell you to meet him back at the Four Squire’s room behind the painting at the dining hall that you can shoot the ballista at. Talk to him there to receive his sword.

The longest loaf in the kingdom! After lying around for a while, it has become hard enough for a bunch of gluten-heavy strikes before it's degraded to a crumbly bun.

Found: Found in the upper area of the Dining Hall

CLUBS (6)
[text about clubs]

Clubs are known for their charge-up attacks, with which you do additional damage and are able to destroy various obstacles.

Found: The first club you’ll receive in the game once you’ve progressed through most of the dungeon. Found in a chest in a room full of tables.

Doesn't look like a star, does not twinkle like a star, but if you charge it up and slam it on someone's head hard enough, he will see the whole milky way.

Found: Hidden in the sewers beneath the wooden structure where the witch resides. Walk beneath it along the wall and jump the small gap.

Weapon of Harly, chief of the orc gang. Home-made out of the bones and teeth of some kind of scaled, red animal.

Found: You will receive the club with Trevor trapped in it after beating the orc’s in their arena. Bring it to the witch in the sewer to transform her back and in return you’ll receive Harly’s Club.

In distant times, adventurers always had swatters to keep annoying fairycubes from giving them false directions or telling them boring anecdotes. Charge to squash enemies!

Found: After beating Suzy in the swamp, she will stampede out to the right. Put on your gumboots or bunny slippers to get across the murky water to find a hidden alcove with the fairyswatter in a sunken chest.

Smack 'em into the pan, stir furiously, add a pinch of salt and with one last charged hit, your enemies are LUNCH! Occasionally turn enemies into useable Meat’n Bone clubs.

Found: Just under the orc’s arena, before exiting out of the castle wall’s gates, jump through the right market booth to walk along a path that leads to a chest with the frying pan in it.

Roast Beef from the bounciest cows, from the greenest farm in the Cubold Kingdom. The meat is so tender, it falls from the bone after some hits. Occasionally turn enemies into useable Meat’n Bone clubs.

Found: Found at the Cook in the Saferoom when he was rescued in the Dinning Hall.

AXES (4)
[text about clubs]

A weapon passed on from Granddice to Granddice, which according to legends got forged to destroy the root of all evil, to grant the kingdom eternal peace. Can only be wielded by a true ruler.

Mandatory first axe that you get when exiting the sewers with the king’s crown. You will climb up the hill and remove it from the tree stump it’s stuck in.

A ceremonial weapon, made to be an Axecalibur substitute and to knight princes and princesses into the position of a Granddice. Despite its decorative function, it's still sharp like a real weapon and has an awesome throwing combo like a real weapon, so...be careful.

Found: Walk up the castle walls from the bonfire near the orc arena and turn left to climb through a window to get to the treasure chamber, turn left and smash the display case with the jewel axe in it.

Made out of wood, to make more wood out of wood for more wooden Woodchopper

Found: In the cliff area between the library and graveyard, turn left and cross the water with the sunken bridge by using gumboots or bunny slippers. Amongst several chopped tree stumps you’ll find the wooden axe.

The purpose of this object is unknown. Maybe it's a tool, used for building the Shining Windmill and the machinery inside. But it also works pretty well as an axe!

Found: Climb up the tall mill in the farm and just before hitting the highest level notice beneath another platform beneath with a chest on it. Use your gargoyle torso to jump off the railings and glide just beneath it to reach the chest with the gear axe in it.

LANCES (2)
The biggest shortened pencil ever seen, surely left behind by a great artist. Charge it for a throw!

Found: Walk out of the theatre courtyard of the castle to the left, along the castle walls towards the swamp. On the nicely bricked road you’ll see a bunch of painting utensils including the pencil.

It says on the handle "Farmer Bob's handbought Pitchforks". Charge it for a feisty throw!

Found: Just before walking through the gate towards the tall mill at the farm turn left instead and walk up/left past a bunch of enemies. You’ll see a cow infront of a pile of hay bales, the pitchfork is hidden inside those hay bales.

Leeks, due to their length and aerodynamic qualities, are often used in the not-so rare food fights. Charge it for one good throw and the opponent is out!

Found: In the Saferoom kitchen after rescuing the cook from the Dining Hall elevator behind the tables.

WANDS (2)
Candy Cone Use: Charge it to turn one enemy at a time into a cupcake that remains docile and can be slain with one hit. Found: You receive it from the chef once you save him from being locked up. You can find the chef at the dining hall, up some stairs where a service elevator is blocked by some debris.

Winged Wand Use: Charge it to slow down time for enemies nearby. Found: Walk up the castle walls from the bonfire near the orc arena and turn left to climb through a window to get to the Princess chamber, it’s hanging above the chimney on the wall.